06.28.2015 Wandering Mind

My mind is just EVERYWHERE right now. I want so much from life and I can see it. But, I can't figure out the path to get there. Or maybe I'm not strong enough to make the changes to get there. 

I've got to change some things. I've got to accept that I can't change some things. That's hard. 

I want to lose this weight. I want to finish what I started at UGA. I want a husband- my lifelong companion. I want to feel appreciated. I want to be healthy. I want to have energy. I want to have a social life. I want to volunteer on Saturdays. I want to be fully confident in my relationship with God. I want to be off of pain medication (and not need it). I want to travel. 

What frustrates me is that I feel like I don't want much out of life. I have simple desires; I just want to follow my passion. I want to chase after it with all I've got. I do chase after it with all I've got but I don't have a lot. 

I don't know y'all. My mind is everywhere. 

06.20.2015 - stuck in a rut

Meh. That's my thoughts right now. Like, I feel like life is pointless. Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for it BUT I just keep doing the same old thing. 

I want to move on to the next season. I'm ready to move on. I'm healthy enough to move on. 

I'm stuck in a rut. I'll be the first to admit it. I feel like... Wait. I'm passionate about education. I feel so at home in the classroom. So, that's what I'm trying to do... teach. But I have a hurdle: UGA. They won't let me be great. 

I'm finally healthy enough to go back to school and finish up BUT my major is gone. So, I'm FOUR classes away from graduating and they are pretty much telling me that it "sucks to suck". 

I can't accept that. I won't accept that. Education is my passion and I'm going to pursue it wholeheartedly. These professors act like it's going to take something away from them for me to earn my degree. 

Anyways, I keep talking to God about it. I keep praying for favor. I keep waiting on an answer. Ever feel like God isn't listening? No? Just me? Oh. Ok. (But that's another post.) 

My goal is to be back in school by August and graduate in December. I'm FINALLY healthy enough to do it!!!! Turn up. So I'll fight for what I want. I'm learning to assert myself. Watch out world because Brittanie-Claire is coming for you! 

Where have I been?

Hey Y'all!

Where have I been?  Dealing with life!

So much has been going on yet I still feel very stagnant.  I abhor that feeling.

Healthwise, I've been fighting.  Diabetes is a lot to deal with but I feel like I am getting closer to knowing how to manage it.  As of May 21st 2015 (a year and a day after my initial diagnosis), I was diagnosed as a Type 1 Diabetic.  Eh.  That's a little frustrating because for a year my bloodwork has been leaning towards the diagnosis of Type 1 but because of my weight, family history and insulin resistance, I was diagnosed as a Type 2 Diabetic.

So, guess what?  I get an Insulin Pump!  Yay!  I've been wanting one since last summer.  I was always led to believe that in order to get an Insulin Pump you had to undergo an invasive procedure but during my Diabetes Education course I was told the TRUTH! The truth is that it is like an IV.  I'll have to insert a needle into myself every few days instead of 10 times per day!--- Yay!

I'll be posting a lot about my Insulin Pump and my journey with it.

What else is new?

Oh, my hair is purple again!  I dyed my hair purple in order to support Crohn's and Colitis Awareness Month [which was in May].  It was a great speaking point to raise awareness for this dreadful disease.  Although I have not had any recent hospitalizations from Crohn's Disease, I have had a few bad days... But, my good days outweigh my bad days.  So... Yay!